experiment

RDH: DECEMBER 2024

01/12/24

It’s been a long weekend - no studio but that is understandable considering the circumstances. Adjust / Adapt.

SURPRISE SURPRISE!!

03/12/24

… application? Glutton for punishment?

04/12/24

Focus! F and A. That is all that matters! The rest is bullshit.

08/12/24

Studio! Part 1. ‘M.C.’ facial tones - hair detail. (Purples / Greens?)

Timely progress on commission. Baby steps - not getting too carried away.

Started well on ‘moss piece’. Think the texture will work well - albeit awkward to get detail and control the paint in the really layered elements.

12/12/24

Has the penny finally dropped? Hopeful that it has. Over Christmas, take a look at [redacted]. Why not!

13/12/24

Submitted!

18/12/24

Didn’t get the P.P. opportunity. But as S. says, it was a strong application so I’m proud of it regardless of the outcome.

22/12/24

Keep forgetting that December is usually a write off - when everything else is taken into consideration.

23/12/24

NT5’s gave an idea. snippets / stills from videos taken out of context. There’s something here (not literally I hope). +

25/12/24

26/12/24

It’s been a month and a half! Art has taken a back seat. There’s plenty to be doing, just zero time to do it. This has been largely out of my control lately.

BUT - in saying that…

When it IS in my control, it is making sure that I’m getting the most out of it.

Energy Levels.

27/12/24

Carving time. Need to get on top of these fatigue levels. Certain points of the day, I could easily pass out and I have caught myself sleeping not long after waking up several times.

Get to the bottom of it.

28/12/24

RDH’s are all well and good - keeping stock of where I was to help where I'm going. But what if, in the new year, at the start of the month, a list was made for that coming month. A target list. Things like:

  • works to start / finish (setting deadlines)

  • upcoming application opportunities

Continued in diary.

29/12/24

Last studio day of the year probably.

Top tone - violet yet still dark.

“…embracing darkness as a tool to shed light on something.”

Hank Willis Thomas (on the ‘A Brush with…’ podcast)

So bloody close! The green background is upsetting my happiness but what to change it to?

31/12/24

When researching ideas for creating a new target list, one thing that came up and, I’ve noticed this in real time, is having or setting a deadline to finish something.

having a time limit to have work completed for the Catalyst opportunity has definitely been helpful. Piece is all but complete.

New Ideas project - NI M’s and S’s. (pandering?)

Target list should include a chance to take my own advice - do the research and contact …

Some resolutions: cull the scroll time - cut out certain habits.

So long 2024. You’ve been good to me,

RDH: JANUARY 2019

01/01/19

Mountain walk with Jan and Rogue.

Mountain walk with Jan and Rogue.

“I think of drawing as a way of getting information and really learning to understand imagery.” - Cecily Brown

Anna Bjerger has a corner filled with ten years of old books / magazines. There’s usually nothing new but it’s about looking at imagery time and again to see if anything jumps out.

OLD IMAGERY RECEIVING NEW CONTEXT.

You need to have a genuine feeling for an image.

02/01/19

Two large canvases. Diptych idea?

03/01/19

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05/01/19

Found in a car park.

Found in a car park.

Nothing done is also nothing ruined.

06/01/19

derry-mural.JPG

10/01/19

If it is to be it will come again.

London is happening in April. Can’t wait!

11/01/19

Idea for a painting: “The To and Fro of Indecision”.

Sketchbook work tonight. Looking at old paintings from second year in University.

Sketchbook work tonight. Looking at old paintings from second year in University.

12/01/19

Boiler suit

Boiler suit

If you look a little longer you will see things that have always been there but not in the same context as before. I’ve started looking a little closer at drawings that have been transferred onto acetate and pairing them off with others that I normally wouldn’t have previously.

st-lurachs-composition.png

13/01/19

Christening + St Lurach’s ruins. This is the biggest canvas I’ve tackled in a long time.

Christening + St Lurach’s ruins. This is the biggest canvas I’ve tackled in a long time.

“Organised Forgetting”

Paint went well today - generally just blocking so it’s not too tasking. Colours - light v dark. Which elements of the image come to the fore and what fights to be heard.

15/01/19

Meaningless vote.

Chris Ofili’s “No Woman No Cry” - canvas rested on 2 heaps of elephant dung covered in a transparent resin.

Sculpture ideas - photos stacked like a house of cards. On panels?

Pyramid.

17/01/19

Trip to Newtownards and Belfast today.

The Ards Art Centre’s Georgian gallery space is stunning! So much light! Really interesting work by Katrina Cobain on show.

The Ards Art Centre’s Georgian gallery space is stunning! So much light! Really interesting work by Katrina Cobain on show.

Stunning work by Alana Barton in the Black Box.

Stunning work by Alana Barton in the Black Box.

Pauline Rowan’s photography was the stand out work for me in the latest instalment of Golden Thread’s “Dissolving Histories” series.

Pauline Rowan’s photography was the stand out work for me in the latest instalment of Golden Thread’s “Dissolving Histories” series.

19/01/19

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20/01/19

Really struggling to get motivated.

The act of drawing has stagnated. If you cut off the source how do you expect the river to flow?

Even working on other imagery (drawings) when painting something else is bound to have positive repercussions?

27/01/19

Took a while to get going. Not really focusing on one task but I think that’s good sometimes.

A little experiment

A little experiment

28/01/19

Been thinking a lot about potential sculptural ideas recently. Give it a whirl?

29/01/19

Sketchbook work

Sketchbook work

30/01/19

“Shooting the Darkness” documentary on RTÉ was fascinating insight from photojournalists who were front line witnesses to some of the most horrific atrocities during the Troubles.

RDH: 01/07/18 - 31/07/18

01/07/18

Crunching numbers.

02/07/18

... feels unfinished ... sections fall apart ... a denying of illusionism ...

"The Mountain of the Heights" in progress.

"The Mountain of the Heights" in progress.

03/07/18

TRAUMA PARADOX - CONCEPT

04/07/18

Shocked. Head spirals backwards.  Sketchbook work today.

05/07/18

'Bardo' - (tibetan) a state between life and death

...instead of saying "What's wrong with you?" it should be "What happened to you?"

relaxing with visual artists news sheet from VAI

relaxing with visual artists news sheet from VAI

1:  Emotional brain basically becomes a 'survival brain' and can hijack the conscious brain.

2:  Alarm system in brain becomes distorted and a person may become hyper vigilant.

3:  Ability to appraise the present and to learn from experience (an imbalance and a resistance to heal).

Developmental trauma takes time to heal and there are no quick fixes.

BLUE SCREEN OF DEATH!!!!

07/07/18

Lifting works from the Townhouse Gallery in Belfast.

Lifting works from the Townhouse Gallery in Belfast.

rough sketch for an installation idea

rough sketch for an installation idea

08/07/18

A research day.

A research day.

09/07/18

Studio wall

Studio wall

Refined some charcoal marks on the large landscape today.

10/07/18

"Traumatic Memory"

trauma - from the greek meaning 'to wound' or 'to pierce'.

11/07/18

NOTES from Psychology texts:

"...the story of trauma is one of enlightenment and forgetfulness.Knowledge gained and lost over and over. A history categorised by criticism and denial."

A tragic paradox of trauma is that one of it's primary casualties is that of truth itself.

Trauma is considered as - "an event outside the range of usual experience." (Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders -III - R - 1980)

Trauma shatters the assumptive world - invincibility has gone and the world is seen as darker, chaotic, evil and dangerous.

12/07/18

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Sketchbook work today.  Little steps are better than no steps at all.

13/07/18

Canvas nearly ready to go in the studio

Canvas nearly ready to go in the studio

Stretched a few canvases today.

14/07/18

detail of landscape in progress

detail of landscape in progress

Colours laid out and tightened back of landscape canvas.

15/07/18

;

16/07/18

"The Mountain of the Heights" in the garden.

"The Mountain of the Heights" in the garden.

Finished "The Mountain of the Heights" today.  Could have done more but I'm learning to let go before work is destroyed.

17/07/18

"Second hand images can create first hand emotion" - Marlene Dumas

18/07/18

A delivery of paints came today

A delivery of paints came today

19/07/18

"Lost Illusions" by Balzac

20/07/18

A pretty good start to my week off; I have been offered a solo show!

21/07/18

Justine McDonnell's "A Composition of She" in the Golden Thread Gallery, Belfast

Justine McDonnell's "A Composition of She" in the Golden Thread Gallery, Belfast

First night out in Belfast in ages and we are evacuated from Laverys due to a 'fire'.

First night out in Belfast in ages and we are evacuated from Laverys due to a 'fire'.

22/07/18

Stunning paintings by Elizabeth Magill at the Ulster Museum, Belfast

Stunning paintings by Elizabeth Magill at the Ulster Museum, Belfast

23/07/18

An idea for using flattened paint boxes.

An idea for using flattened paint boxes.

Too many ideas floating around.

NB:  To loosen up before working from chosen imagery, I want to try and do some work from life beforehand.  Can't do any harm.

A five minute self portrait study

A five minute self portrait study

24/07/18

"The Landis Museum" exhibition at the CCA, Derry

"The Landis Museum" exhibition at the CCA, Derry

A trip to Derry for meetings and gallery visits.

Detail of one of Colin Davidson's remarkable paintings in "Silent Testimony" at the Nerve Visual Gallery, Derry

Detail of one of Colin Davidson's remarkable paintings in "Silent Testimony" at the Nerve Visual Gallery, Derry

I first saw Colin Davidson's 'Silent Testimony' three years ago in the Ulster Museum. Today it was in the Nerve Visual Gallery in Derry.  Still so powerful.  The 'us and them' mentality is nonexistent and removing divisive language and politics reveals the human suffering on all sides.  It is so important.  So glad to have seen it again.

Beginnings of a small canvas experiment

Beginnings of a small canvas experiment

Merging two old drawing works onto a new canvas.

Merging two old drawing works onto a new canvas.

Have multiple little eggs going on at the moment.

Imagine... Rose Wylie on BBC iPlayer

...where presence is evident...

"I think you're a lot happier if you don't mind a bit of imperfection." - Rose Wyllie

25/07/18

The two sons of Oedipus, Polynices and Eteocles translates to "Manifold Strife" and "Truly Glorious" respectively.  Might just be the title of a new painting that's been started.

Good news: I have two works pre-selected for the Royal Ulster Academy 2018.  Fingers crossed!

26/07/18

"What's for you won't go past you."

Progress on a small painting study

Progress on a small painting study

TAL R on Louisiana Channel

"It's strange, but you can't make a painting without content. Content is not like solving a problem in school or university. Content much more means that you've built up enough reason to do it. And content is also shitty because if you begin to identify too much with the content then you can't move. There are too many people shouting out in the chorus. Content starts you up and you leave it behind. It doesn't mean that you remove yourself from the content but it's too cumbersome to carry along. So when I'm working, it's not mechanical at all but it's cool headed because I'm not questioning the content. I've left it behind. It's interesting to say that content is crap, but you can't live without it." - TAL R

27/07/18

Four works in progress in the studio

Four works in progress in the studio

"A Manifold and Truly Glorious Strife" - painting in progress

"A Manifold and Truly Glorious Strife" - painting in progress

Really pleased with how "A Manifold and Truly Glorious Strife" is shaping up.

candle.JPG

"You have to create something that lives in a kind of mystery." - TAL R

28/07/18

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Worked on "Rehearsal Study" today.  Played with skin tone and facial features using an air compressor to manipulate the paint. A slightly less controlled appearance.

31/07/18

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So pleased to have been able to attend the iDA reception event at the Atypical Gallery in Belfast.  This website is only possible through the iDA grant from atypical and the Arts Council fo Northern Ireland so I'm extremely grateful for their continued support and guidance.  Congratulations to all the award recipients this year!

Whoever heard of a Black Artist?" on BBC iPlayer.