art studio
On Saturday 3rd October I had the pleasure to show some guests around my studio and was interviewed by the wonderful folks at the University of Atypical. You can watch the video below and check out other videos by the gallery on their Vimeo Page here.
A huge thank you to Jane, Deirdre, Stuart and all the team for making this happen!
Power is out.
The Rashomon Effect: When the same event is described in significantly different and often contradictory ways by people who were involved.
I do feel a little stuck with the Crimean Painting. Some sketchbook work - get back to the drawing board.
Death Masks: bottling the soul, bottling the trauma.
Very strange few days. ‘Taking Orders’ painting - just not sure where to go with it. Leaving it aside for now and having a look at adding a recent sketch and incorporating it into an old abandoned piece. The only good thing I can see in the failed ‘St. Lurach’s’ work is that weeping willow to the left. It should stay in some capacity.
Very lethargic for some reason.
Thoughts = NOT A REALIST PAINTER!!!
Lifelike/ reality isn’t what I’m aiming for in drawing or painting. Yes, sometimes a more realistic application or approach is required depending on what the image dictates. EG: ‘GO’K’ works in that it hints at realism but ultimately leaves the majority of the portrait minimal - barely any detail. This is not just limited to composition, but especially colour I think.
Belfast bound.
So good to get to the MAC for the degree shows from the Belfast School of Art.
‘Confessional’ reopening was great! It’s a show I’m very proud of.
Some good progress on ‘The Voyage Home’. Less is more - even on this scale I think. Suits the image and composition well.
Finished!
Halfway through September! HOW?!?!
Figuring out ideas for next steps and possibilities. Good to get some sketching done tonight. Forgot how accessible sketching smaller than A4 is.
Guston and de Kooning - both developed making works with a ‘formula’ able to commercialise work / work that could be made in their sleep and sell no problem. Both rejected this formula and started again.
Integrity.
‘Elizabeth’ and ‘Mary Ann’ studies - the looser the better.
Detail of ‘Elizabeth Study’ - work in progress
I think I’m coming close to a mini burn out as far as studio work is concerned. Might be good to take a step back, read and research for a few days and see where we are.
Finished the little portrait studies. Really different approach but that’s no bad thing. Started some new canvases.
“Art is a wound turned into light.”
‘Elizabeth Study’ and ‘Mary Ann Study’
Research - that’s about it.
Some good progress in the studio today.
Got scared very easily.
Sketchbook work.
Five canvases on the go at the minute. Best to focus on one or two at a time. First up., ‘Waiting Room’. It’s been a while from I attempted this image.
Seats / Symbols?
‘The Waiting Room’ - detail
What was light at the end of the tunnel has turned into a dark abyss. Shrug it off and keep going.
Sketching
So the past few days have seen a real drop in productivity and drive. Reasons or not —> focusing on work will help. Taking a mini break will also help. Easy to fall into old, procrastinating habits.
Meaty questions.
Studio all clean and tidy!
So saddened to hear of the passing of Chris Ledger. She was a true friend of the arts in NI and helped me in both a professional and personal capacity. Her tenacity and drive will be sorely missed.
Cleaning and priming.
‘Seashore Jester’ … over-painted to the point of no return - burnt and slashed. Good progress on “Enfield Study” though.
Close up of “Enfield Study”.
It’s finally happened! I’ve had a little painting accepted into this year’s RUA exhibition!
Wee day off.
“Enfield Study” finished.
Watched ‘Apocalypse Now’ properly for the first time. The real animal sacrifice at the end was disturbing.
Sketched out some new canvases including a narrow set for a triptych.
Object connected to the figure rather than the figure itself so may need to rethink the centre canvas.
…a few people have told me how “Enfield Study” disturbs them and makes them feel uncomfortable. So a job well done.
Lots of blocking in compositions today.
Greenberg vs Read (HANDBAGS!)
Sketchbook work.
Jenny Saville in the “A Brush With” podcast is great!
When asked what is art for, Saville replies:
“Art is for life. Art is for survival. You know it’s a shock of recognition that you feel a sense of belonging you recognise yourself in the world. I really believe it’s for survival. It’s intrinsic to being human. We either have to make marks or it’s like singing or making music. It’s fundamental to being a human being. I can’t imagine doing anything else. When I’m in the process of painting I feel very in touch with myself in a sense that nothing else I’ve ever done in my life does.”
Satellite paths
Nothing the past few days due to another trip to the hospital.
One year to go.
Finished “Exhibits A to C”. Good to get painting again after a little setback. Chuffed to be names Catalyst Art’s Member of the Month for August!
Some good studio time in today.
“A painting which is from a specific photograph - you have to go beyond the photograph so you have to make the paint do something and once it gets a nature of itself then it belongs to the world and it takes a long time to get be in that field.”
Jenny Saville (link for interview here)
“Avarice is the enemy of virtue.”
Leon Battista Alberti
Sketching and mostly failing.
Studio time but nothing too strenuous.
Great to have a virtual catch up with UoA folk!
Trauma is inarticulate.
Some good progress on “But I Don’t Get It”. Still flat in areas but it’s nearly there.
Finished “B.I.D.G.I.”
Some more Matisse-inspired bamboo work for shapes in the foreground and that’s the large painting finished! Title to be confirmed later.
Abrupt awakening.
So “The Hill of the Red Witch” it is. Very close.
Eventually got some good ground work down on two new pieces. Some human hair included.
Great Julie Curtiss talk with Brooklyn Rail.
2013 - 2015: 14 works (over 3 years)
2016 - 2018: 36 works (over 3 years)
2019 - June 2020: 16 works (in 18 months)
That’s crazy!
Really pleased with “Left Out” thus far but the mouth on “RPM” is really annoying me!
QUESTIONS
Working out left hand on “L.O.” is tough. It’s not the shape of it but the lay of the fingers that’s the bother. Pre-mixing … is needed to unify the hands and face. It’s the difference in definition between the upper and lower hands that are jarring a bit.
Days that just don’t go your way. THUMB NEEDS TO BE A FRACTION LONGER!
Working method today is attacking the canvas in micro stages.
NON FINITO = nice idea.
Does something have to look finished before being deemed complete?
Detail of “Left Out”
…I limped home tonight. Painted for nearly 11 hours. Not sure if “Left Out” is done, but it’s bloody close.
… Yes it’s there!
Good drawing time this evening.
Priming, studio cleaning and two little pieces drawn up. Interior one has promise.
The Ruination of the World.
“Rock Pool Memory” - the original drawing is not exact and so the dimensions are a little skew-whiff. Possibly why the painting is not coming together.
Horrible day painting but at least it beats not doing anything at all! “Rock Pool Memory” is just that - a memory.
A sense of critical…. ?
Such as strange pain down arms and shoulders last night. Shake it off or…
Trip to A&E - allergic reaction to insect bites. The usual then.
Studio time.
High contrast in BT’s face might be best avoided. Playing around right now just.
Nice chat with Chloe, Dominic and Niamh - some interesting discussions.
![“Hotel ‘78” complete. [] is right - something slightly different about it. Softer maybe.](https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/5a9c08aa372b9620b4f4faf4/1596298573274-34GK5VOLBNDGHLF24D6J/16.jpg)
“Hotel ‘78” complete. [] is right - something slightly different about it. Softer maybe.
A nice dull background on “Seashore Jester”.
Applied … again.
Solid studio day. Resurrected “Rock Pool Memory”. Tonal values not there on “Seashore Jester” just yet but happy enough so far. Stumbled across the old Enfield painting that I abandoned four years ago. Decided to give it another crack.
Been a few days of home improvements.
Sketched out little commission and cleaned out palette.
Martha Tuttle talk on Brooklyn Rail excellent! Links to antiquity and the tactility of the work is fascinating.
The past few days I’ve literally been going round in circles with “Rock Pool Memory”. Originally I thought executing the proportions properly would have solved any issues that were cropping up but no. I think I’m in two/three minds as to how to approach it so perhaps shelving it isn’t a bad idea for now.
I think it’s important to take a step back sometimes and focus on other elements of practice. So today is a drawing and research day.
“ART IS LONG, LIFE IS SHORT” the reversed first two lines of Hippocrates’ ‘Aphorismi’
Nearly six hours of sketchbook work today.
Did not expect to but “Rock Pool Memory” is finished. It really has been an unprecedented time of creativity. Silver lining in a weird and unnerving time.
“Rock Pool Memory” finished.
The Troxler Effect - monsters in the mirror.
Treated myself to some art books.
Detail of ‘Enfield’ painting in progress
Short stint today, Slow progress but progress nonetheless.
Parts looks OK and then others are close to the point of madness. At least the dead crab looks well.
Clarify your eye.
Mixed what was left on the palette after 7 weeks of caking. It produced this gorgeous black / green hue perfect for the large canvas. Dad gave me a hand to clean it as I only have one at the minute.
In two minds but some good ground work. VAI café now with Alan Phelan and Ursula Burke.
UB: Being a witness to what has been happening.
UB: Bridging the gap between antiquity and the contemporary.
AP: John Joly Photography method
Hospital appointment: I can take the wrist support off!
Painting again. Very very rusty but such a nice feeling to be standing in the studio again.
Detail of fracture
…there are areas that work really well (the transparency of the plates in the skull). Painterly approach. Pretty much the rest is just clunky and stale.
The following quotes are from ‘Theories of Modern Art: A Source Book by Artists and Critics’ by Herschel B. Chipp:
“The source of all inspirations. Whether the artist works directly from nature from memory, or from fantasy, nature is always the source of his creative impulses.”
Hans Hofman - on the topic of nature.
“…a synthesis from the artist’s standpoint of matter, space and colour. Creation is not a reproduction of observed fact”
Hans Hofmann - on the topic of creation.
Mucked up.
Built up layers on two smaller pieces. They are at that stage when there is something missing - limbo.
‘Circular Lapse’ was in that place until the overlapping discs were added. Patience.
“Those who do not want to imitate anything, produce nothing.”
Salvador Dali
Put the brakes on today.
Detail of ‘Jester’ drawing
New projector at long last. It doesn’t move an inch!
Got to using a brush at the end of a bamboo cane like Matisse used to.
“It was in me like the rhythm that carried me along. I had the surface in my head.”
Henri Matisse - on the use of bamboo tool
Visual and bodily. Some good progress today.
Detail of “Beatrice Study”
Troy Michie Talk Art was very good.
Detail of "Beatrice Study”
Finished “Beatrice Study” but paid the price; head is banging. Am I doing too much too soon?
Well today was a write off. Spent several hours at the Royal in Belfast looking for answers to the pounding head and the potential CSF leakages. Feels like recovery has taken a step back by a few weeks.
Trebuchet magazine has arrived and some updates to website.
Slept in.
Would love to visit the Christo and Jeanne-Claude covering of the Arc de Triomphe in October 2021.
Studio time feels a little panicked for some reason. Settle the head.
Now I.N.A.R.P. but I think there comes a level of pressure when you are personally and emotionally connected to a person to try and capture them as they once were. Settle the head and shake it off!
Well - you do get days of going backwards. Pre-mix before committing?
Cinematic tropes to frame personal trauma - à la Roxanna Halls.
Close up of “Back in my Day”
Really early start. Seems to have worked - finished “Back in my Day”. When in a certain frame of mind I seem to work quickly. Time is something I have in spades at the moment. Have probably over-painted areas (hands) but best leaving it as is and moving on.
Drawing and tonal work to “Race to the Bottom” - working title.
A homemade multi-brush handle.
…any shout of a practical day in the studio has disappeared. May be a blessing in disguise though as it’s probably best that I don’t spend every day standing in the garage through this recovery period.
…in terms of “RttB”, washes are or will probably key to keeping the action / immediacy of the figures alive.
Really pleased with how some of the facial work turned out today and I think the differing tones of navy/blue/grey will work.
2pm start - better than not starting at all I guess. After a few hours of frustration it was decided to just omit the second figure from the left. Eventually made more sense compositionally - balancing out the tumbling ensemble.
Removal of a figure
Need to be careful.
Different perspectives - slightly out of focus.
Am I too picky?
Sketchbook work
Over six hours of really solid drawing time today.
Two canvases primed. Focus vision and work on that one element. It isn’t a race.
Before I literally wipe the slate (palette) clean - could I use those silky black colours on the large canvas? Probably shouldn’t have got up at 5am. Eyes are rolling in head and its only 10:16am…
…waiting on a phone call. It was 47 minutes later than scheduled and on the phone call they decided to reschedule and to expect a phone call next week…
On third wind now but thought it best to call it a day before setting out the stall entirely.
‘A cup of clarity from the clarity flute.’
Eye detail - in progress
Unified the sky of the large canvas with a thick thick covering of velvety black paint. Pushing the oppressive sky downwards closing in on the running figures. Claustrophobic.
Now, learn from previous over meddling mistakes and move on!
Michael Armitage talk from Brooklyn Rail was fantastic! Got to ask a question too!
Studio Shot: 27/06/20
Really need to sort out a decent sleeping pattern.
Charcoal work today and not much else. Notes and revising for a presentation.
Very very close. Addition of the poppy. Centuries ago, the poppy was known as the witch’s flower. This is where the Irish for poppy comes from as ‘cailleach dhearg’ translates to ‘red hag’.
VAI Show and Tell: Northern Ireland addition. Delighted to have taken part.
“Inside Man” starting point.
Ovid’s ‘Metamorphoses’ - The ethics of looking.
Not sure if attempting “The Ferryman” on this scale is the right move.
The falling boy: “Full of Grace”.
Blocking.
Some really good progress in the studio.
Commissions
“If your art doesn’t reflect your family and community then what’s the point?”
Dale Harding - Tateshots
Happy anniversary JG!
Applications.
Never rains but it pours! Buckets needed.
“Full of Grace” coming well. Would like to incorporate ultramarine blue - hint to the Virgin Mary in there (via the window).
Very funny search for a protractor.
Farcical.
Eventually got to painting after helping with a birdbox.
Should have been “Confessional” exhibition’s natural end.
Such a battle with “Inside Man” at the minute. Struggling with that balance of realistic approach and the drawing mark.
It’s been a while: “I AM NOT A REALIST PAINTER!”
Not overly happy with the finality of “Inside Man” but best to finish up now before I properly overcook it.
All but finished another painting. It’s very strange times indeed.
“Circular Lapse Study” - detail
Six hours and I’m pretty much no further forward than when I started. Going to have to take a completely different route to accomplish this. It would help if I had a goal in mind. Detailed vs Out of Focus. In between? Trying to tackle the green slab all at once isn’t working.
Back to drawing basics turned to mush.
One step forward and four back.
Little talk with VAI’s online café went well with really nice feedback on work in progress and the studio set up.
Meetings.
Some really good painting put down today.
Need to box up and send off!
Reset. Breathe.
Looking. So important. Doesn’t mean you can’t allow for spontaneity or randomness in the process.
“Ferryman” is finished!
A cartwheel with no floor. CT Scans reveal right-sided skull vault fracture and subdural haematoma. Off to Royal Victoria Hospital.
Avulsion fracture to right wrist.
Out of hospital. Time to start recovery process.
Focus turns to show opening.
Spend a little time looking and you might find a way in. Now at that limbo stage with “No Remorse”. Compositionally solid but colours and painterly gestures are off.
Surprising bound forward on “Self Portrait with Sketchbook”. Face is mask-like (maybe a good thing?)
Nervous as hell. First stop - Ursula Burke in the Ulster Museum. Wonderful scope and the wall mural is stunning. A quick jaunt into town - in GT’s “Dissolving Histories” I especially liked Stuart Calvin’s work. Great to see Dougal McKenzie’s project space show “More Bad News”. Beautiful little touches.
Next onto the MAC for Mark Garry’s “Songs and the Soil”. Placed over the three galleries, the work is immersive and stunning.
Helped with the last little touches to the show prep. Great turnout for Late Night Art and the feedback has knocked me back - in the best possible way. Really not good at taking compliments. Marcus Keeley came by for a chat in the store room for his “Instant Feedback” podcast.
Wee stay with Jane. A beautiful house and a beautiful soul. Finally got to visit QSS for “Four Female Painters” exhibition. Amazing space and great work. Alana Barton’s piece “Blossom” made me cry and not even ashamed to say it. It struck a nerve. The delicacy of the child’s little fingers touching the adult’s hair. Beautifully painted.
Took myself back to re-watch Mark Garry’s videos in the MAC. The close up recordings of the horses is haunting and strangely intimate.
Few days off but little updates online here and there.
Sketchbook work
Scary times. Back to the looking phase. It seems to help.
Self Portrait: face is still very mask-like. Reminds me of a still from “Les yeux sans visage”.
…knowing when to quit for the day is important.
Slow burning day but when I eventually got to studio and began making real progress, the power goes off!
Serves me right for getting ahead of myself.
“No Remorse” in progress
The “In Conversation” that was to take place with the show in Atypical has rightly been postponed due to ongoing circumstances.
Have to self-isolate for 14 days. The worries mount.
Sketchbook work for the first time in 11 days. Feels like a lifetime.
Is there a better, more cohesive way to go about the drawing side of practice?
I think immediacy, or the notion of immediacy, is still important.
Transferred some recent drawings to acetate.
STEP UP!
Studio time with Radiohead.
A bit of sketching but mainly organising imagery.
“There’s no point in worryin’ what ye can’t control.”
BAK
“No Remorse” is finished. There are parts that still annoy but all in all pleased to it’s best to leave it and move on.
Pushing and pulling with “Self Portrait with Sketchbook”. Frustrating but really fun at the same time!
Cleaning palette and studio up. Also stripped the background of “SPwS”. Too similar to the skin tones and made the canvas seem quite flat.
So bloody close!
Last day of quarantine.
Great to take part in the VAI online café and to get an insight into Tinka Bechert’s wonderful work.
“SPwS” finished. It is very wonky as it’s taken from a very wonky sketch from a few years ago but there’s something about the sketch that made me want to try and develop it into a painting for quite some time.
Detail of “Self-Portrait with Sketchbook” - painting in progress
Right, get paint down! Started two little pieces today and “The Crown of Dionysus” is complete"!
“The Crown of Dionysus” on my very dirty studio wall.
The last palindrome day for another 111 years. Damn rugby is distracting!
“No Remorse” - background building up.
Parcel.
“Religion decays, the icon remains; a narrative is forgotten, yet its representation still magnetises (the ignorant eye triumphs - how galling for the informed eye).”
Julian Barnes - ‘Géricault: Catastrophe into Art’
“No sooner do we come into this world, than bits of us start to fall off.”
Gustave Flaubert
Detail of body - “No Remorse”
Using storm Ciara to aid in the drying process.
Submission started.
Mobile installation?
…might be a little out there. Will sit on it for a while.
“Laziness is a sign of mediocrity.”
Voltaire
Visit by Jane and Hugh.
Victim / Perpetrator / Both
linking current work.
All pieces are wrapped and ready to go.
Slight change of plan.
Sketchbook work tonight.
Nerves are shredded already!
Work is on its way.
Well that’s it! Install complete I’m really happy with the exhibition and now it’s a waiting game for the opening.
Repeating motifs. mem: Like that odd shoulder loop that happens in drawings and then translates to paintings.
Made good progress in some areas of “Remorse” (bodies) but mostly have over painted to the point where I can’t put anything else down. Better to walk away now and go again another day than to push it over the edge today. Have reintroduced some rough drawing elements into the background.
New Decade. A quiet start to the year but with a feeling of resolve and drive to get things done.
“For the dead travel fast.” - Jonathan Harker’s Journal
Bram Stoker’s Dracula
mem: Sickert’s approach to “Portrait of Hugh Walpole” - one of my favourites - could work. Drastic yes but by simplifying the colours… more painterly…. ambiguous.
The Optimism Gap: Locally good. Nationally bad.
“Unsafe” Commission
Finished commission. Looked at Sickert and Dumas. Previously it was haggard and stale.
…relieved!
A lot of scanned drawings tonight.
Renewal
Five posts in five weeks.
Potential title?
Performed open heart surgery on the 206 today.
“No Remorse” painting is moving very very slowly.
Detail of “No Remorse” in progress
Overthinking personal issues.
Belfast today.
Incense in sunlight
Issues of “crown” install is mind boggling.
DIONYSUS
Office updating and uploading.
Jade Riley wrote a little piece about my practice. Chuffed!
Ideas with Dad for install concepts.
Hodge-Podge.
Bit of breathing issues but otherwise OK.
Winter sunset
Eventually got out of a rut (well even a foot out of the door is good) and got sketching.
“To remove unwanted threads of your past (regrets or mistakes) is to undo the tapestry of your life.” - JLP
Last night I had the pleasure of attending the opening of “The Dark” in the CCA. Agnes Meyer-Brandis’ work has made me look at geese in a slightly more positive light.
Started two new canvases and pleased with the progress of “Crown of Dionysus”.
“Crown” finished - including wall fixing designed by Dad.
C.E.’s shouldn’t be halted until the weekend.
Finally getting around to reading the collection of art essays by Julian Barnes. I think since I got it the day I visited John in the Royal I’ve been avoiding it.
Late night sketching is better than no sketching at all!
Hatchet sketch
“Time dissolves the story into form, colour, emotion. Modern and ignorant, we re-imagine the story: do we vote for the optimistic yellowing sky, or the grieving greybeard? Or do we end up believing both versions? The eye can flick from one road or one interpretation, to the other: is this what was intended?
Julian Barnes - “Géricault: Catastrophe into Art”
All in all a horrible day.
It is never wise to stand on a plug.
UNSAFE SYMBOL
In a crisis are we all destined to retract to a small amount of predetermined protocols?
It is what we do in these scenarios that characterise who we can become - but that shouldn’t be confused with a concluded definition.
“Gaugin - A Dangerous Life” on BBC IPlayer
“The work of a man explains that man”
- Paul Gaugin
Sketchbook work this evening.
Really didn’t get as much done as I should have. Started commission though which is good.
So I now own a car!
A very tough week. Frustration at zero creative output. Filter and breathe.
… so I am grateful so for many things. The positives outweigh the negatives. It is OK to have lull bits. It is still be seen as necessary time to off load while creating space for work down the line.
Read the Room.
Some more sketchbook working out tonight.
A very foggy night
The welcomed return of lists - getting things straightened out for the first time in a long time.
If all else fails, even just sitting in the studio is good. It can induce making…
Detail of commission in Progress
Have decided to try and switch off over the holidays. Easier said than done as I’m never more than a few steps away from RD to jot thoughts/ideas down on. Will be good to spend some time away - clear some head-space.
2019 has been an odd year. Rejection, award, rejection, solo show, more rejection…
Making time and adhering to a schedule of sorts has to be up there with priorities in the new year. Keeping this blog going is good. Some folks say, isn’t it odd to type out what you’ve jotted down a few weeks ago but I’ve found that in order to move forward, it’s good to have a refresher of what has just preceded and digesting this helps put aims and dangers into perspective.
New Year’s Eve Poker Night and Rogue isn’t having a good run of cards at all.
… good job I checked…
Sketching today but no joy. How to move past this?
A good tidy up in the studio. “H” going well.
Helping Jan with some wire-wool spinning experiments.
Recording today and some solid sketchbook time. It’s so important. It is where ideas form and lay roots.
“Long years of secrecy have turned their faces into masks.” - not sure where I heard this from.
Detail of “Helen” - oil and charcoal on canvas.
“Helen” finished up.
Consciously hold back images.
EMPATHY
What am I doing?
“Real painters understand with a brush in their hand.”
Need to try and make one little hour of creative work each weekday.
What a difference a boiler makes!
Save mode now!
Clean Palette.
Spider skin
Studio…
Detail of “Bogland Sackrace” - work in progress.
Drawing is essential in practice. It’s not even the success of the outcome that’s important but the act of looking and really scrutinising an image or object. Trying to find a way in.
Wrapping process.
Sketchbook work.
For tomorrow, let loose!
I’ve been lingering long enough on small little intricacies.
It’s not the first time I’ve struggled with a figure in profile.
Need to just look!
‘Art of Spain’ documentary : Goya was deaf!?
Black paintings were done “to the brink of incoherence” (AGD).
‘Bogland’ completed
A really good day in the studio. Huge improvement to ‘Sackrace’. The face in the central figure could be better but that is where I’ll leave it. Back is signed so it’s official.
Studio shot: 17/08/19
Unplanned progress on ‘Ferryman’. More painterly background.
Getting there with the small chores.
Early stages of “The Brown Bull of Cooley”
Started a new large canvas. Took on the image of a woman in motion - her stance suggested a figure that could be in battle. After a little research I decided to add a typical Celtic sword and shield combo. So this found magazine image turns into Queen Medb of Connaught.
Once the figure was on the canvas I was unsure whether to incorporate the bull (Medb’s infamous cattle raid of Cooley as inspiration) but curiosity got the better of me and I tore on with it.
Basically blocking the image up but it is promising so far. It will be interesting to see the fight between Medb and the bull in terms of who will come out dominant where in the composition.
Material delivery!
Studio work and ‘Ferryman’ has stagnated. Some parts work and others flop.
At that strange limbo point where a painting you’re working on fights back and refuses to yield. When one point of grievance is adjusted, two more pop up.
Today - more so than others - has been spent reflecting on lost loved ones and parts of that has made its way onto canvas. Little nods to moments once shared with someone no longer here.
I haven’t had this level of personal attachment to a work in progress in a long time and it has made the already frustrating back and forth of a painting’s final stretch all the more agonising.
Can you paint over a memory or is knowing that these little nods once existed enough?
Almost a disaster. Too hung up on certain elements and it is holding the piece back. So the notion of blurring the background and having the foreground sharply in focus works. Execution at the moment is lacking sadly. Need to figure out how to fix the mesh fence but will need to redo all the good work from today. Lesson Learnt.
Essentially yesterday was a pure slug fest in the studio.
Action is better than inaction. Working out grid for fence work.
Solo show by John McMacken
Belfast School of Art Degree Shows were great. Some outstanding work. Nina Johnston’s tree installation on level 6 is amazing. Regardless of levels/grades that many of the graduates are embarking on that’s the really exciting part.
Looking back, I adored my time in university but detested my degree show. All but one piece has been destroyed and it was the start of a huge, and still ongoing learning curve that’s led my practice to where it is.
Meeting in the evening went really well. Some good feedback and ideas for an upcoming project.
Little break from the studio today to recharge from the overload of art from yesterday.
“Frank Bowling - What do Artists Do All Day?”
The beginnings of planning an exhibition layout.
“Allowing yourself to be vulnerable is a strength”
“Dana Shutz: How Do You Depict A Feeling?”
Detail of the removal process.
Bit of start and stop in the studio but fixative giveth and fixative taketh away!
Just spied Grace McMurray’s piece in the Royal Academy documentary.
“Paula Rego: Secrets and Stories” - Great way to start the day!
“Depression is like a crown of thorns”
Dander down to the river with the dogs.
More pushing back on “Sack Race” although I could have easily got sucked into working on tiny details and not looked at the whole picture.
Glazing, Hatching, Cross Hatching, Direct, Sfumato, Painterly, Impasto, Staining, Dripping, Gestural, Broken Strokes, Dotting, A La Prima, Patches, Feathers, Scumbling, Washes, Bravara, Directional.
Sketchbook work.
Knowledge / Creativity / Inspiration
Beginnings / Liberation
Summer Solstice. Pleased with how mesh fence is coming.
Need to let go of aiming to get the little things perfect in the work. Ultimately its holding up the process. Obviously not saying to go full ‘Sloppy Joe’ on it but recognising when things get knit picky - take a step back and reassess time spent on something inconsequential.
Little break day. Sophia Campbell on “Sky’s PAOTY 2019”.
There’s no sugar coating it. Intrusive thoughts bombarding for practically 8 straight hours.
Embarrassing, frustrating but mainly just terrifying. I don’t want them anymore.
It will take time to get to grips with what is going on.
Currently going through potential imagery. I think its good to scan through images from time to time to build up ideas.
Getting to grips with terms and conditions and sorting out a plan of action together.
Slight change of tact…
Some tonal work on “Bereft Clown”
Lagging behind.
Applications submitted.
DISTRACTIONS leads to NOT DOING WORK leads to FEELINGS OF GUILT leads to DISTRACTIONS leads to NOT DOING WORK leads to FEELINGS OF GUILT leads to DISTRACTIONS leads to NOT DOING WORK leads to FEELINGS OF GUILT leads to DISTRACTIONS leads to NOT DOING WORK leads to FEELINGS OF GUILT leads to DISTRACTIONS leads to NOT DOING WORK leads to FEELINGS OF GUILT leads to DISTRACTIONS leads to NOT DOING WORK leads to FEELINGS OF GUILT leads to … etc etc.
How do you combat this?
“Discipline is key" - JG
Break the cycle by physically setting time aside for practice. Depending on the day of the week and other commitments, the type of productive work will differ.
Cleaning the palette
One good sketch is better than not drawing at all.
“What’s for you won’t go past you.”
Reworked pattern and colours on clown today.
Great to get painting today albeit a little later than I would have liked.
Counting works - didn’t realise there were so many!
Belfast. Great to see the last day of ‘The Question of Feeling at Home’ in PS² - curated by Moran Been-Noon. Bonus to get a run down from Moran about the show and to see Cecilia Bullo’s work in the flesh! Been excited to see it since her talk in the DLR LexIcon last year. Next was a visit to Belfast Exposed for the ACNI collection show with a solo show by Linda Conroy in the upstairs space. Conroy’s work is disturbing and utterly absorbing at the same time. Removing notions of the individual from religious ritual resonated with me personally. Then it was on to ‘Porous Plane’ by Lennon in the Golden Thread Gallery. The sheer scale and vibrancy of the work was immense. In the information leaflet it says that “no knowledge is required to enjoy the beauty of these paintings” and that Lennon “invites each of us to find ourselves and arrive at our own inclusions”. Leaving room for the viewer is something I’m particularly keen on.
Lastly onto the wonderful ‘Alternate Perspective’ in Platform featuring work by Aimee MeLaugh and Karl Hagan. Both reflect on ‘memory, people, places and trauma’. The grandeur of history painting coupled with highly personal and intimate narratives. Wonderful painting exhibition.
Sarah Smith
PS²
Cecilia Bullo
PS²
Susan MacWilliam (left) and Peter Richards (right)
Belfast Exposed
Linda Conroy
Belfast Exposed
Lennon
Golden Thread Gallery
Karl Hagan and Aimee MeLaugh
Platform Arts
Project profile submitted.
It’s the journey not the destination.
Nearly into third month and nothing really to show for it. Plenty of works in progress but not enough progress being made.
Blocked out “Bereft Clown”.
Found an ogham poster on North Street with an interesting translation.
Vault studios is amazing - especially EMIC’s studio space!
…text to coincide with next solo show…
Studio work today. Thought I was close to finishing ‘confessional’ but it might be further away than I imagined.
“You make a mistake when you explain the paintings through the war.”
Mark Stevens - on Bacon’s “Three Studies for Figures at the Base of a Crucifixion”
Several shooting stars.
Probably the most difficult thing I’ve ever had to do. Childhood hero reduced. It's a real jolt to the system.
Trauma doesn’t discriminate. It’s so subjective that it can defy explanation or description. Nightmarish.
Materials courtesy of the University of Atypical’s iDA award arrived to the studio today.
Need to learn to keep some things to yourself.
See it through. Stay strong and keep head up.
Panic attack today.
You never fully appreciate someone until its too late. A true legend that has shaped so many. Time with family is so important.
Resolutions < Revolutions
Moon-rise over Glenshane.
Thought I had a good night’s sleep but my body is telling me different. Need to draw more again.
Getting lost in thought about art is a joy. It’s like taking a mini vacation.
Some sketchbook work. Not much but it’s a start.
Look more before putting pen to paper. This is not to say to lose the immediacy during the act of drawing but to take a breath to absorb and examine what an image has to offer.
Finished “Confessional”. Maybe when the mind is distracted slightly it makes studio work more of an automated response? Decisions were made and action was taken.
Not saying having a completely distracted head-space works. Far from it. I’ve been there plenty of times and it’s disastrous. No. It’s more a case of - you’re in the studio and you have a clear(ish) idea of where the work will go so you follow that. The decision making dilemma is lessened due to the preoccupation of other matters going on upstairs.
A bit of work done to “Bereft Clown before clearing the palette and studio up for another year.
… all but done…
Do I need a foreign colour? “Afore the Stoop” went in a slightly different direction than first thought. I think I had that quote by Helen Johnson still ringing in my ears about imagery possessing different surface qualities and being on different registers on the same picture plane.
The buzzard is still; hovering overhead while the still-life is in flux. Melting in on itself. To not just merge separate imagery on the one canvas but to treat them differently via technique. I’ve done this regularly in the past but never to this extent before and definitely not on this scale. There’s loads going on: blocked areas, melting, washes and burning/corroding of the surface for texture.
“Confessional” is a different beast altogether. It’s going to be a slower process - building up washes of colour, drawing elements back in followed by more washes until it comes to an end or a crossroads. So far so good. It’s not really a colliding of images. It’s the notion of what a negative of a pattern could do to another image.
Refreshing to see organisations opening doors. The model is being altered.
Kept hearing the shrieking of a buzzard every time I went to work on “Afore the Stoop”. When I looked it was perched on top of the tallest tree at the end of the lane and then glided off.
Some sketchbook work. Not a lot of time but that’s my fault.
HELP!
For studio work: cautious steps or daring leaps? Annoyingly close to finishing “ATS”.
Submission writing hurts my head.
Films to watch:
Finished “ATS”. Still bits that annoy but for the sake of not destroying it entirely, I don’t mind the imperfections.
Help has been indispensable.
Still waiting on magazine.
Egon Shiele Documentary - transcending the idea of the body as beauty.
Nothing.
Belfast bound for curator talks but looking forward to visiting some galleries first.
Jane McCormick’s “Not Half Right” at the University of Atypical was absolutely amazing. Insanely strong drawing and sculptural elements.
Ali Cherri in the MAC International 2018. His work was the stand out work for me.
Curator talks as part of Belfast Open Studios from Visual Artists Ireland offices. Speaking at the event: Nora Hickey from CCI in Paris, Ika Sienkiewicz-Nowacka from CCA Warsaw, Dean Brierley from Caustic Coastel in Manchester and Anna Ciabach - formally of Monopol Gallery in Warsaw.
Work is being used as an example to show other artists about finding your own voice. Chuffed.
…someone has been keeping an eye on my progress and that is something!
Another trip to Belfast for more galleries and then a Speed Curating event.
Gerard Carson’s “Submersible Extractions” in Platform.
Patrick Colhoun at the Golden Thread Gallery.
Still of Barbara Hammer’s work at the Golden Thread Gallery exhibition.
Layout of the ‘Speed Curating’ event by VAI held in Belfast Exposed.
It has been a hectic but brilliant few days. Yesterday I called into Platform to see Gerard Carson’s “Submersible Extractions” and a solo show by Dryden Wilson. I followed this up by a quick look at the Barbara Hammer exhibition and Patrick Colhoun’s project space work in the Golden Thread Gallery. Then it was time for the speed curating event at Belfast Exposed.
… do research. What artists i admire….
…Strange. Nothing negative. Just nothing.
A lot of information. A real painter?
“In Defence of Representation” essay by Tristan Garcia.
In western philosophy the representational object is either a copy, a sign or a duplex.
“… according to the semiotic model, there is no representation without signification, that is to say without interpretation.” - Tristan Garcia
“Visual Pleasure and Narrative Cinema” - Screen (1973)
“The Victim” - Saul Bellow
Tried sketchbook work - failed miserably.
Projection onto fog screen.
Thunderchild?
Line of connection between viewer and work - GO’H
Ask the question: what do you see?
Yesterday I eventually got painting around lunchtime - back and forth with ‘Confessional’ but progress made. Great talk with GO’H about ‘the gaze’.
Leaf blowing.
Need to select paintings for Framewerk Christmas show.
“The Trouble with Painting” - ICA (YouTube)
“What you’re interested in in the world will feed back into what you are interested in as an artist.” - Alison Pilkington
…speaking about dreams, a quote from Alison Pilkington’s drawing seminar from the RHA really stuck out. I’m paraphrasing here but the guts of it is this: talking to people about why you make the work you do (or about your inspirations for that matter) is like talking to people about your dreams. People aren’t overly interested when someone else describes a dream. It’s subjective and personal and it’s all but impossible to get the experience across properly.
Sketchbook work.
A difficult few weeks to come.
… of interest. Attainable small steps to reach big goals.
Delivery mix up.
Booked VAI speed curating slots for November.
…LA… fingers crossed!
initials in ogham
Experiment in the studio with a degree of success. When a fine layer of fixative is lit on the paintings surface, areas of the canvas that are predominantly charcoal or thin layers of colour are singed and blister - creating an interesting effect. Safety first though.
Jan is right —> the lighter background to “Pioneer” was more unsettling. Rectify.
Staring at “Pioneer”. I think I’m hesitant because its… I don’t know. I think the colours are too similar between light and shade. By the same token - you don’t want it to become too contrasting and cartoonish. A foreign colour introduced into the third panel may point a direction.
Flying by the seat of pants but you can’t control the spontaneous. Some detailed work today. It is getting there. Attention directed towards other matters.
… paintings and clusters of drawings - like a shotgun spread of memories. Jumbled - linked yet conflicting. Fighting for dominance.
\\\THE TRAUMA PARADOX\\\
Just realised a connection between “AMATGS” and the ivy crown. Oedipus plays would have been played during the festival of Dionysus - who is associated with a crown of ivy.
“ I gave myself permission to follow my voice and that’s what my whole career has been. I still give myself permission and no compromise. I compromised before but not when I became an artist.” Mark Bradford
“Into The Void Magazine” submission successful!
Sketchbook work and now watching the original ‘Suspiria’ for the first time.
Notes finished for presentation. Pleased with burning effect on triptych.
… was suggested something on Friday. Well it was more of a dialogue regarding “Pioneer”; the first and last sections work. They’re strong but the one that should be the strongest and the anchor, the middle piece is way behind. Changing from a triptych to a diptych? Leave it for a while - continue working on all three before abandoning the middle piece.
Using ash as a painting/drawing medium. Religious links? Why do ideas come in the final minutes of the day? Processing process.
On way to Dublin. Looking forward to talking about work in DLR Lexicon. Not nervous. Yet.
Just saw the most beautiful fox casually strolling across a field outside Armagh.
I’ve been skirting around issues. The ‘recall’ notion might be worth exploring again. Drawing. Painting. Video. Audio.
The DLR Lexicon is stunning. Really enjoyed the other talks - especially work of Cecilia Bullo.
Yesterday’s trip and talks were great. Just wish I had more time to go around some of Dublin’s galleries when I was down. Decided it was best to drop the middle canvas in “Pioneer Studies”. Finished the other two pieces and happy with the results.
A little tweaking to “Afore the Stoop”.
Dad suffered a bleeding eye following his operation.
Have been neglecting practice and methods during the week. Ards - it seems a long way off but it will fly in.
Keeping your finger on the pulse is no bad thing.
Personal history is a source - not the explanation. ‘imagine…’ with Tracey Emin on iPlayer was insightful. Have a new found respect for Emin’s practice and quite like a few of some of her new paintings.
No paints were used today but three canvases were started. The smallest piece - I don’t think will have legs. As a drawing it is strong but I feel it won’t work on canvas. I’ve drawn up “Bereft Clown” again - a different size to the previous square stretcher. Will see how it goes. The third canvas is the one I’m most excited about. It’s a merging of two images but in a slightly different way. First is an image of a German officer stationed in a concentration camp. The other is a negative of a confession screen. The idea is to project light through the lattice onto the portrait. Fright Night in the jungle was great fun!
Slept so much. Slow progress but progress nonetheless.
Spacing error.
“I’m really interested in creating moments of ‘push and pull’ in paintings and having different registers of imagery with different surface qualities - so one thing might be compositionally in the foreground but materially might be being subsumed by whats behind it.” Helen Johnson
A shot of the studio with two large paintings in progress. Left: "Afore the Stoop" Right: "A Manifold and Truly Glorious Strife".
